Painting by our mentor Lisa Wright. “Blood and Fire” ‘I will baptize you with water but He who comes after me will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and Fire’
-Matthew 3:11
God has been showing me the fathomless depths of His love. I knew my life was completely changed when I accepted Jesus as my savior and He has given me strength and comfort during some very challenging seasons. But I realize now that my understanding of the living God was very limited. Last November I went to a Beauty for Ashes retreat where not only did I receive deep healing but I learned that God is active and communicates with us in many ways. God has communicated with me with words, visions and an inward witness (some describe as intuition or when you “know”. God has given me some beautiful visions that have really helped me to heal and understand His love even deeper. I was hesitant to share this as it is rather personal and some people, even Christians are quite skeptical about the supernatural nature of God even though the Bible is very supernatural. If you want to learn more, the book of acts is a great place to start! Also please reach out if you have any additional questions, I’d love to talk!
The Visions:
The first vision I had was actually before I even left for training camp. During my quiet time with the Lord I asked Him to show me how He saw me and asked to sit in His presence. He revealed to me a beautiful picture of Jesus lifting me up as a child of about 5 with pig tails and a pretty sundress. He then sat me on God’s lap as God sat mighty on the throne. “To him who overcomes I will grant to sit with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne” Revelation 3:21. I felt an overwhelming peace and comfort as I sat in the strong arms of my father and rested my head on His shoulder. Jesus stood by smiling at me and the Holy Spirit rested as a dove on the arm of the throne. I could have sat in this moment forever and I have often returned to its memory for comfort. This vision helped remind me that God is my father and He is always there for me while deepening my understanding of His love as the perfect father. This vision was extra special to me since my dad has passed away and I had really been missing him that week.
During worship time at training camp, I had another beautiful vision. In this vision I was dancing with Jesus. He held me in his arms as we swayed to the music. He told me how much He loved me and showed me where He was in some very painful past memories. In each memory, Jesus was standing in front of the danger, lifting me out of the trouble, sitting nearby in my despair as I turned away. As I came back to the dance, I cried from an over abundance of love. He dried my tears and looked at me with divine love. He then began to dance a little faster and spun me around. I was a young woman and dressed in rags. As He spun me around I realized I was in the throne room of God. I looked up and saw the same throne I had once sat on with Him and my heavenly father smiled down at me and my rags turned into a dress fit for a princess. Jesus promenaded me around the throne room and I saw my earthly father, my grandfather and many other since passed family members applauding along the perimeter with a host of others. Jesus told me He was my bridegroom and I felt the deep chasm of love as he looked at me. As the throne room faded at the edges He kissed me with a kiss of the Holy Spirit and the Holy Spirit filled me with a golden river. When I returned to the physical room I was in, I felt so full, healed and tingling with warmth.
During training camp there was a teaching on forgiveness. I have prayed many times to forgive people who have hurt me and I thought I had. I am a pretty forgiving person and many times in my life I forgave things I probably should have hung on to a little longer or at least learned from. When they did this talk I did not expect to have the reaction that I did but I realized I held on to a little pebble of unforgiveness. I had forgiven many things but I kept a small pebble in my heart because I thought it would protect me from being hurt in the future. God told me that I needed to let it go and He would protect me. I am so thankful God lets me come to Him in my mess because that is exactly how I responded to Him. I responded as a bratty teenager who didn’t want to let that stone go, I had forgiven so many things why couldn’t I keep this tiny stone. It wasn’t until revival that night that God showed me how my focus was shifted because of this tiny stone. Instead of the throne room being centered it was to the left just a little in my vision. God was tender and patient with me and assured me He would not let me get hurt again and that was never His intention for me in the start. I gave Him my tiny stone and asked him to pardon the person I held unforgiveness for and Jesus brought him into the throne room and said it’s up to him to accept it. After this I saw a vision of my brand new heart, tender, new clean and red with not breaks or cracks. God sealed it with the Holy Spirit and a film encased my heart.
I hope that from my experiences you learn that God is alive and active. I hope you learn that God loves you so much in your rags and imperfection and He longs for a relationship with you. I pray you turn around and realize Jesus has been there through it all just waiting for you to turn around. He isn’t pushy so He won’t force you but He wants to carry your burdens, He wants you to feel His peace, He wants to love you, to heal you and your heart. I pray you invite Him in and let him carry you to the father. I pray you lay your head on his shoulder and rest from this weary world.
Revelation 3:20: “Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me”
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